Homeschooling as a "Directional" and Not Merely "Destinational" Experience

I'm struck by how often in life we benefit from the direction - from the aim - we've taken to reach a certain outcome before and sometimes even regardless of whether or not we actually obtain the stated objective. I suppose this blog is filled with evidence of this. I certainly did not begin homeschooling TO reap most of the blessings articulated here. Homeschooling was FOR the kids. I wanted them to have deeply enriching childhoods, I wanted them to find balance in their success however they defined it, and I wanted them to be able to learn about whatever it was that seemed to fuel their souls and passions.

Are we THERE yet? Maybe, in brief snatches a time. On the path, certainly. And still waiting to arrive. But along the way there have been a host of other benefits reaped by this direction, before our stated destination is fully in view.

The ones springing to mind to today are likely echos of sentiment I've expressed before. I don't think that is because they represent ALL homeschooling has to offer. I'm sure the blessings of the direction vary from family to family, parent to parent, and child to child. But if these sound repetitive, I believe it is because they are consistent. They persist regardless of the ages of my kids, regardless of what ELSE we are doing or not doing, regardless of my inexperience in what I'm doing growing to a comfortable confidence that something is working.

The first blessing of this homeschooling direction is TIME! I have enjoyed more quantity AND quality time with my kids. This has enabled daily pleasures like (still!) snuggling with my youngest, now eight years old; to more life altering outcomes like being able to let my oldest move out of the house when, at 13 years old, his talent and dreams caught him up and away. (A choice I might never had allowed were it not for the wealth of memories we'd created together over his entire life to that point.)

And it has not only been "time with mom" that has been a blessing. The kids have also had more time to develop relationships with each other and our extended family - that's time spent vacationing with grandparents, nannying for their little cousins that live out of state, and visiting and playing with cousins, uncles, and aunts whenever we have the opportunity to get together. We have been able to seek out this family time more often, not constrained by rigid attendance requirements, and enjoy it better when we are together.

Homeschooling has also increased my intellectual curiosity. I think of all the things I have learned studying history with my kids I never would have known, remembered, or cared about. I've tried painting with my kids who need "art." We put science events on our calendar as a high priority, and enjoy going; without homeschool setting our direction, it's unlikely these outings would be on my radar, let alone my priority list. I'm even more politically engaged than I thought I would be, because I'm engaged in creating a future for my kids instead of passively letting one unfold.

This has all translated to a more active family lifestyle. Looking for engaging ways to learn has made us more likely to travel, to attend events in the community, and to care about community and involve ourselves in it. (Not to mention that being networked with homeschoolers is an immediate connection to so many resourceful and active people that activating ourselves becomes all the more simple.)

Finally, homeschooling has transformed me from a "program follower" into a "problem solver." My parenting has become both more responsive and more proactive. Every parent faces challenges in raising and securing an education for each child that meets their needs and benefits their future possibilities. Homeschooling has helped me to take an active role in meeting these challenges. I DON'T assume "this is just the way it is," or that "maybe it will be better next year," or that "this is rough, but there's nothing I can do about it." When problems arise, I actively engage to find solutions and assume I have some power to make things better. And when opportunities seem few, I create them! Rather than lament that this or that is not part of my kids' school experience, I find ways to add in whatever it is that is lacking! (This chance to create and implement solutions and growth experiences is extremely satisfying to my soul, I would add!)

In the end, who my children become, what THEY take away from their homeschooling experience is still their choice. We can never enforce the success of another human being, regardless of how we measure or define it. Despite my "destinational" intentions, where my children GO is up to them.  But I have been so blessed by our journey, by our direction in homeschooling. And these blessings seem to shine a warmth and joy on so much of the rest of life!